Relationship Advice

Have His Back
You might not agree with your guy when he's had a riff with a friend or he thinks his boss is being unfair, but you should always be on his side...and vice versa. Otherwise, you'll both feel like you can't count on each other. That doesn't mean you have to take the "you're so right" route all the time. Just hear him out, and let him know that you'll support him no matter what.
—New York City psychotherapist JoAnn Magdoff, PhD

Spend a Little Money on Each Other

You don't have to wait for a special occasion to give small presents to show your love. In fact, gifts are more fun-and meaningful — when they're not expected. Try to get into the habit of exchanging sweet tokens of appreciation for no particular reason. Don't go and blow your paycheck though. It's not about being extravagant; it's just a way of showing that you really get — and think about — each other. Maybe you buy him a tee of his favorite band that you saw on sale or he gets you a pair of pajamas in your favorite color.

Be a Good Date

Face it, no one can stay fascinating forever. After being together for a while, the initial excitement fades, and your guy can start to get kind of boring sometimes. Hey, don't think you're off the hook — if you're feeling a little ho-hum about him, the feeling is likely mutual! To combat the blahs, take turns coming up with an interesting date idea every month. Keep the time and details to yourself, and try to think outside the box — dinner and a movie is not exactly innovative. An awesome concert or a snowboarding lesson, for example, is a much less predictable treat. 

Dr. Phil's Questions to ask when in a relationship

These are five very difficult questions that you need to ask yourself to see where your relationship stands. Just how dark are your feelings about your relationship, and just how negatively do you think about yourself and your partner? Under no circumstances should you share these answers with your partner. We tend to over exaggerate our negative feelings when we get in disappointing situations, and we forget to emphasize our positive feelings. But for now, lets get it all out — and into a journal. Have the courage to be honest here, even if it is scary to admit certain things through your answers. The only thing worse than having a relationship in trouble is to have a relationship in trouble and be in denial about it. As is the case with so many problems, early and appropriate intervention can be the key to the ultimate outcome.

1. Considering that at least one definition of love is that the security and well-being of your partner is as significant to you as your own security and well-being, then would you say that, based on results, you behave in a way that reflects that you are in love with your partner? Why?

2. Using that same definition, is your partner in love with you? Why?

3. Knowing what you now do about your relationship, would you still get involved with the same person if you had to do it all over again? Why?

4. When comparing yourself to other people in relationships, do you feel that you have been cheated or have settled too cheap? Why?

5. If you could break off your relationship or get a divorce from your partner right now without any inconvenience, legal costs, or embarrassment, without any undue hardship on your children (if you have any), would you do it? Why?

By dealing with these issues, you've taken an important step in getting your relationship out of the ditch. By getting real about your relationship, yourself, and your partner, you have identified some dangerous and powerfully destructive forces in your life that you must now contend with. Are you in this relationship because you really want to be? Or are you in it today simply because you were in it yesterday? Spending your life with someone because it's just easier not to change is no basis for a healthy relationship — and if you feel this way, then you've got some work to do. The truth may not be easy, but it's the first, exciting step toward making that crucial U-turn that your relationship demands.
http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/332

Relationship Tips!

Showing Love
Although hearing the words, "I love you" is special and important, sometimes you wish you could tell your mate as well as hear from your mate those words, but in special and unique ways. Here are some ideas of how this can be accomplished:

• Rent his favorite movie, even if it is something you do not like, and plan an evening alone where you can be with him as he enjoys his special treat.
• When she gets out of the shower, hand her a warm, cozy towel just heated in the dryer.
• When you make him pancakes, first pour the words, "I Love You" on the griddle and cook for a minute to brown. Then, pour more batter over the words to create a round pancake. The result will be a pancake displaying those three special words when you flip it over.
• While she is out of town, wash her car and surprise her by picking her up in a clean, shiny car at the airport.
• Take him out to lunch.
• Have his favorite breakfast on the table along with the morning newspaper.
• Instead of bugging him to go to the grocery store with you, let him stay home.
• Display your favorite picture of the two of you on the refrigerator.
• Buy her a subscription to her favorite magazine.

Split The Responsibility
Whether dating or married, weekends are always full of errands and chores. If you find that on the weekend things are lopsided, help your mate out. For example, if there are kids involved and one has a soccer game while the other has a baseball game, at the same time, offer to take one of the kids and your mate take the other. Make this a special time by packing a special lunch or snacks. Perhaps one of you has company coming and the house needs to be cleaned, laundry done, and groceries purchased. Set aside something you need done and offer to pitch in to help. Simply say you want to help and ask which of the jobs you can take over. This gesture will show your mate that you really care by sacrificing your time.

http://www.affirmations-for-success.com/relationship-tips.html

Relationship Tips

1. Cuddle Time

When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their everyday existence. However, as the relationship progresses or after children enter the picture, the cuddling stops. Take some time just to cuddle. If your mate is sitting on the couch watching a movie, or laying in bed reading, scoot close and tell them that you just want to cuddle. This makes both people feel secure and loved.

2. Breakfast In Bed

When was the last time you or your mate were served breakfast in bed? Never? On a Saturday or Sunday, when nothing special is planned, get up a little early and fix their favorite breakfast. Include the morning newspaper as an added bonus. Although they may be shocked, you can be guaranteed that this gesture of love will be appreciated.

3. Secret Getaway

Plan a nice weekend getaway to some place off the beaten track where you can enjoy some privacy. A quaint cottage or charming bed and breakfast would be ideal choices. Scout out the area ahead of time and choose a few things that the two of you would like to do in the area but just be sure to leave plenty of time for you to enjoy some alone time. Order a nice bottle of wine or some hot cappuccino and relax in front of the fire! Make this a romantic weekend where you can rekindle your love.

4. Communicate
When couples are having problems in a relationship, communication is the first thing to stop. It is often easier to just be quiet than to get mad. When rebuilding relationships, just as communication was the first to stop, it now needs to be the first to start. This will require that both individuals let down their guard and pretty much throw caution to the wind. Healing in the relationship cannot start until you talk. Make an agreement that you will talk about anything and everything and that you will listen, really listen. That does not mean that you will agree with everything, which is perfectly fine. However, if you do not agree, do not yell, rather, the two of you need to calmly discuss the issue and together, work out a solution. This is hard work but within a very short time, you will both feel much better, individually and as a couple.

http://www.affirmations-for-success.com/relationship-tips-2.html